so... i just feel like rambling right now... i doubt any of this makes sense... and so begins my usual stream of concious rant that i think is real intelligent but i can't even put together when i read it...
 
It's so funny how i want things so much, and when i finally get them, they're really annoying.
 
friendships... you can't enjoy the good parts of people if you can't stand the bad parts of people. It seems i am crushed with criticism against people... so that it becomes almost impossible to truly be their friend...
 
They say religion is the opiate for the people. I'd say that apathy is far more effective.
 
Apathy. It feels so good. But it feels so confining at the same time.  It is because of that uncomfortable confinement that we can't break free... it's a catch 22 i guess.
 
I really hated that book. That was stream of concious as it should be. it wasn't the literal style... neither am i denying the author's talent. It's just it was so good, that i felt like i was drawn into the same insanity as the character... and it was scary... i guess that's one of the reasons i couldn't finish it. it's a pity. I do that to so many things.
 
I did it to fight club. I felt so drawn into the insanity that i had to stop. I've never finishedthe movie. I don't know the ending. instead, i live in fear of where i stopped and never see the whole picture.
 
and now i really need to stop doing this because it hurts my head, and i need to sleep.